The best thing about the start of college football season isn’t the pageantry or the neutral site games or the announcing teams or Michigan’s roster or fancy uniforms.
The best thing is that it’s here.
We don’t have to watch old games from last year or grainy classics before HD and score boxes and replay reviews. We don’t have to talk about what might happen because it’s going to happen.
We’re going to have real, live results with implications galore. We’re going to go from pretend hot seats to real ones. We’re going to go from guessing to second-guessing.
We’re going to have tailgates and big plays and questionable calls and heroes who seem to come out of nowhere.
More than anything, we’re going to be distracted from the miseries of the world, especially with what is happening in Houston.
Football is a game, a glorious game, that will allow us to put aside our troubles and immerse ourselves in three-plus hours of school pride and angst and that uncomfortable view from the edge of the couch when a big play is coming.
It’s en route. Not just the games but the overreaction. I’m not talking about the way we will analyze the game in the post-mortem of Week One, but the way you will question The Picks.
Dr. Football is back for another season. Like most teams (sorry, Rice and Oregon State), the slate is clean. Let’s see how I can screw it up.
FLORIDA-MICHIGAN: Jim McElwain said this week he doesn’t think Florida still has the tape of the Citrus Bowl two years ago because he might have thrown up all over it. Maybe that’s why Michigan is wearing maize uniforms, in case one of those freshmen can’t keep down his pregame meal. Would you be able to tell? With the events of the last couple of weeks, it’s difficult to stick with the Gators. Don’t ask me why, but I am. Florida, 24-17.
ALABAMA-FSU: The new stadium in Atlanta looks pretty amazing. I hope I get to see it in December. I’d prefer if Alabama is not there. I’ve seen that movie. Alabama, 30-24.
TEXAS A&M AT UCLA (Sunday): UCLA has Josh Rosen, who may be the first pick in the NFL draft. Quick, name another UCLA player. See, East Coast bias. A&M, 42-28.
BYU-LSU: It’s not too late to send money to the Red Cross. The people out in the Houston area need all the help they can get. LSU, 27-10.
VANDY AT MIDDLE TENNESSEE: This is the game the poor, little SEC cannot afford to lose if it’s going to get back some respectability. Gosh, are we putting eggs in the Vandy basket? Vandy, 21-17.
N.C. STATE-SOUTH CAROLINA: Will Muschamp has never lost an opener as a head coach unless you count the Idaho game at Florida, which lasted only one play. That changes. N.C. State, 23-18.
KENTUCKY AT SOUTHERN MISS: Why is Kentucky playing Southern Miss on the road? Asking for a friend. Kentucky, 38-21.
MARYLAND AT TEXAS: This is an under-the-radar game that should be interesting. Heck, it’s the first week so every game is interesting. Texas, 39-21.
GEORGIA TECH-TENNESSEE (Monday): This game is also in Atlanta, two days after the big one. It’s almost like Bruce Springsteen is playing Saturday followed by a Little River Band reunion two days later. Tennessee, 28-21.
SOUTH ALABAMA AT OLE MISS: Winner gets Hugh Freeze’s black book. Ole Miss, 38-17.
Contact Pat Dooley at 352-374-5053 or at firstname.lastname@example.org. And follow at Twitter.com/Pat_Dooley.