Kicking off The Picks
Published: Friday, August 31, 2012 at 6:01 a.m.
Last Modified: Friday, August 31, 2012 at 12:54 p.m.
It was a rough offseason for college football, but Dr. Football made it through pretty much unscathed. There were no suspensions, no sanctions, no jumping to another conference for the money, no scandals. Dr. Football is jacked up on 5-hour Energy and Pop Tarts and ready to go for another season of The Picks.
I don't know what I'm looking forward to more: the games this weekend or that we will have results to talk about next week.
I have goals for this year, but I am going to keep them to myself (eat barbecue every day of the season) because I think once you say your goals (talk wife into letting me buy a convertible) out loud you expose yourself if those goals (lose 20 pounds and not find it again) are not met.
Before we start, a toast to another football season. Raise your glasses, or in the case of so many suspended and dismissed college football players, smoke 'em if you got 'em — Here's to another football season. … 'Twill be gone before you know it. … And when you hit your knees at night … pray Lane Kiffin will find a way to blow it.”
Bowling Green at Florida: Will Muschamp said the quarterbacks are not going through an audition in the first half. Well, not an “America's Got Talent” kind of audition. I mean, Howard Stern won't be able to reject either one. But it is an audition. Florida, 31-10.
Alabama vs. Michigan (at Arlington, Texas): This is a quarterback nicknamed “Shoelace” against a defense nicknamed “In Your Face.” Denard Robinson is so fast he could play linebacker for Alabama. Alabama, 27-13.
Tennessee vs. N.C. State (at Atlanta): The Vols announced this week they will prohibit ticket scalping near the stadium, including on Phil Fulmer Way. You are allowed to scalp tickets on Derek Dooley No Way. N.C. State, 29-23.
Auburn vs. Clemson (at Atlanta): There's an old joke that Clemson is Auburn with a lake. No, Clemson is Auburn with a quarterback. Clemson, 35-19.
Notre Dame vs. Navy (at Dublin, Ireland): Top of the morning to ya. Irish coffees all around. College football in Ireland? This Dooley's dream has finally come true. Notre Dame, 23-14.
Georgia Tech at Virginia Tech: The Yellow Jackets are going to unveil new helmets Monday night. I heard they will include the symbol for Pi. Virginia Tech, 19-17.
Miami at Boston College: BC fans want to know why the Red Sox couldn't ship coach Frank Spaziani's contract to Los Angeles while they were at it. Miami, 35-20.
Kentucky at Louisville: Maxwell Smith won the starting quarterback job at Kentucky. If you call that winning. Louisville, 30-13.
Boise State at Michigan State: Really great under-the-radar game. Michigan State, 34-28.
Ohio at Penn State: Some people think Ohio will pull the upset. I'm not one of those people. Penn State, 24-14.