TPC's final holes deserve moniker

PONTE VEDRA BEACH — Let's get this straight. Again.

The Players Championship is not a major and almost certainly will never be a major. You can't rewrite history and suddenly award majors to all of the players who have won it when it wasn't, so it's not going to happen. I've said all along that the people who want this to be a major would be better off just accepting it for what it is — a wonderful and unique tournament.

That said, I think it's time.

Time for a nickname.

There is Amen Corner at Augusta National, the Green Mile in Charlotte at the Wachovia, the Bear Trap at PGA National, the Blue Monster at Doral.

You have at TPC Sawgrass the best finishing holes in all of golf. Yes, I said all of golf. Nos. 16, 17 and 18 offer everything a course can ask for in a finish. They are risk/reward holes with as much water as green grass.

Pete Dye's design at the end of his masterpiece is almost perfect. A par five that is reachable but can also produce disaster. A par three that is in the heads of golfers as soon as they climb out of their courtesy cars. A par four that demands one of the toughest tee shots imaginable.

You have the most photographed hole in golf with 17 which is arguably the most famous hole in the sport. And if you survive that you stare at a fairway that looks like a sliver compared to the huge lake that is a slight pull-draw away.

It really is a thing of beauty. There are tougher finishes (Quail Hollow where the Wachovia is played would be No. 1), but none that are more interesting.

Augusta? Please. As great as the course is the last two holes are nothing special unless you're leading by one and need two pars. Pebble Beach's 17th and 18th are spectacular, but 16 is nothing special. Think U.S. Open and you don't think about the holes at Oakmont or Bethpage as much as what happened on them.

This is it, the best. In fact, this entire tournament is identified by those final three holes.

So let's go, people. Let's come up with a nickname.

It's not that easy. I asked my buddy Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel — who came up with the Fun 'n' Gun nickname for Steve Spurrier's offense — for some help.

“I've got nothing,” he said.

OK, let's move on. Draw the holes on a piece of paper and maybe a shape will inspire something. It's kind of a horseshoe but not really. It kind of looks like a sleeping snake.

The Snoring Snake?

That's not going to cut it.

The Boa Restrictor? The Venomous V?

It also looks a little like a claw so we could go with the Claw of Doom or Claw and Order. Or not.

The course is built on a swamp and the lakes still have a few alligators but The Swamp is already taken by the other Gators.

We could make a play on Pete Dye's name.

Do or Dye Corner.

Dye Hard III. Hmm, I like that.

Three-Pete?

I threw the possibility out in the media center here at the course and got a lot of head-scratching and a few feeble efforts. Some these are mine, some are not. The ones you like are mine.

Mistakes by the Lakes.

Saw-Crash.

The TPSea.

Splash Corner.

Triple Frown.

Three of an Unkind.

Players Hater.

Fear Factor.

Frenetic Finale.

Bogey Bayou.

Wet 'n' Wild.

With the move from March to May the grass on the course has changed from bent to bermuda. So how about the Bermuda Triangle?

I'm open to suggestions. Or maybe I should just take my own advice and let it be.

If nobody has come up with a nickname in 25 years, maybe it's just not there.

But I really like Bermuda Triangle. Even if it has been used.

Spread the word.