Remember me? I just robbed your store. But now I'm lost.


Published: Thursday, January 27, 2005 at 6:01 a.m.
Last Modified: Wednesday, January 26, 2005 at 10:50 p.m.
In January, a 22-year-old man robbed a Chevron station in Vancouver, Wash., and eluded police in a high-speed getaway, but he then got lost and wound up back at the same Chevron station, and, apparently not recognizing where he was, he asked for directions, allowing the clerk to notify police, who soon arrested him.
  • Samuel Woodrow was convicted of burglary in Santa Fe, Texas, in December, one of four men who had broken into a home. However, the men had fled, empty-handed, when they were scared away by overhearing a police call from the video game Grand Theft Auto ("We have you surrounded! This is the police!"), which the resident's three grandsons were playing in another room.
  • On Dec. 20, a United Parcel Service driver was involved in a crash on an icy road near Keene, N.H., suffered a head injury and was taken to Cheshire Medical Center, where tests were to be performed, except that the required machine for them was broken (though parts were on order). After checking the status of the order, hospital personnel discovered that the parts had been shipped and were in fact in the crashed UPS truck, and someone was dispatched to the scene of the accident to retrieve them.
  • Howard Goldstein, 47, was charged with murdering his landlord and fellow Orthodox Jew, Rabbi Rahamin Sultan, in October in Brooklyn, N.Y., in a rent dispute, and police said that when they knocked on the door to investigate Sultan's disappearance, Goldstein answered dressed (according to the New York Post) in a gray blouse "with a plunging neckline," slacks and pink high-heeled shoes, and wearing bright red lipstick and blue eye shadow "that clashed with his long beard." A search of his room turned up pre-beard snapshots of Goldstein in an array of fashions and wigs.
  • Stephen Kauff, 33, was arrested in Westerville, Ohio, in December in a police Internet sex sting but told officers, when he arrived for a long-arranged meeting with an alleged "14-year-old girl" at an apartment complex, that he really wasn't interested in sex but was just curious whether police actually do set up sex stings over the Internet. (Answer: Yes.)
  • According to the British parents' organization Bullywatch, which issued blue wristbands to students to publicize the campaign against school bullying, any kid wearing the wristbands was immediately targeted for attack by bullies (December).
  • According to an October Los Angeles Times dispatch from Yemen, one government solution to "tam(e) the violent underside" of the nation's tribal culture is to fund itinerant poets to roam the country and channel lawlessness into constructive thoughts. Illustrative of most Yemenis' opposition to both American influence and their own government is this verse: "The Arab army is just to protect the leaders/They build their rule on the pain of the people/Democracy is for the rich/If the poor man tries it, they'll call him a thief." (And in October, National Liberty Fund published a book of poems by Sami Al-Arian, written from his cell while awaiting trial in Florida on federal charges of aiding the terrorist Palestinian Islamic Jihad. Sample: "(Was it) worth playing global police/even if it meant half-million Iraqis deceased.")
  • Latest in Upscale Pet Care: Much plastic surgery on dogs, said Brookline, Mass., veterinarian Scott Groper, is done for medical reasons (e.g., Boston terriers' small noses interfere with breathing), but vanity (but not the dog's vanity) sometimes plays a role, as Los Angeles surgeon Alan Schulman told the Boston Herald in January. "Most of the time," he said, "it's women who have already done everything they possibly could to themselves and are starting to (make over) their dogs," with pooches' low-hanging lips and drooling problems being the primary reasons for dog face-lifts.
    Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679 or WeirdNews@earthlink.net. or go to www.NewsoftheWeird.com.
  • British garbage collector Tim Byrne is not only eager to get to work every day, according to a report in London's Sun newspaper, but for the past 11 years, he has voluntarily hauled trash alongside local collectors while on holiday in vacation spots such as Tenerife and Mallorca. Said Byrne, "(R)ubbish plays such a large role in my life that I simply don't need to (get away from it).
    Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679 or WeirdNews@earthlink.net. or go to www.NewsoftheWeird.com.
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